There are four phases of sexual arousal. In order to understand why women function one way sexually and men function another way, you have to understand how we become aroused.
In women, this is the phase in which the clitoris becomes larger and more sensitive. The vagina becomes moist, the inner parts of her vagina swells, and the inside of her vagina lengthens. Her breasts increase in size; nipples become erect and more sensitive. Her heart rate increases and her blood pressure goes up.
THE PHYSICS OF BEING TURNED ON
In men, the symptoms are very similar. His heart rate and blood pressure increases; his nipples become more erect and sensitive. His penis becomes erect and his testicles will draw up closer to his body. It is within the excitement phase that both men and women begin to anticipate sexual activity.
If a woman continues to be stimulated, her clitoris will retract beneath the hood that covers it, her outer lips (labia majora) enlarge, her cervix elevates which causes the inner part of the vagina to widen. Her naval and chest may become flushed, and her vagina continues to moisten.
Orgasm is the part of the sexual response cycle that many people dwell on. Many women never experience an orgasm, but these same women will report that they are satisfied sexually. In women, the outer part of her vagina rhythmically contracts and so does her rectum, and some women will emit a milky secretion. In men, the prostrate and urethra contract rhythmically and semen/cum is expressed.
In women, the clitoris returns to normal size and position and the outer lips return to normal shape and size. This is where men and women are markedly different. Women do not have a refractory period, so if stimulation is continued in an enjoyable way, she can have as many orgasms as she can allow for.
In men the resolution phase allows for the penis to become soft, the testicles move back down, and his muscles relax. At this point a refractory period occurs. Once a man ejaculates he must stop and recharge before starting over in the sexual response cycle. Men cannot have multiple orgasms.