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HOW WOMEN GET TURNED ONA woman’s sex drive is very complicated.  There is more to it than whether or not she is turned on.  For a woman to want to engage in sexual activity, she has to feel like it.  As we explore a woman’s sexual response cycle, you will start to understand why women sometimes do not feel like having sex.  If you understand why the feeling is not there, then it will be easier for you to understand some strategies to get that feeling back.

The Sexual Response Cycle is a cycle of excitement that women go through in order to engage in sexual activity.  There are four phases: Excitement, Plateau, Orgasm, and Resolution.  Not all women experience each of these stages, and if this cycle is obstructed in any way, the sexual experience can and will be interrupted.

When a woman becomes excited there is an increase in blood flow to her genital area and her breasts.  The clitoris expands, the outer lips (labia majora) swell, and the vagina lengthens in anticipation of sexual activity.  During the excitement phase there is an increase in heart rate, perspiration, and breathing rate.

The plateau of sexual activity is when there is an urgent flow towards orgasm.  This is the moment during sexual activity when things get really hott!  She experiences an increase in muscle tension, blood pressure, and heart rate.  During this phase her breasts, nipples, and outer vagina become even more engorged.

At this point I have to point out that only 25-30% of women experience orgasm during vaginal intercourse.  So even though we all work towards it, many of us are not having them.  Whether or not a woman reaches the orgasm stage should not be used to measure whether or not she enjoys herself.  The orgasm stage is the climax of sexual excitement.  This phase lasts from 2-15 seconds and there are 3 different types of orgasms: 1) clitoral, 2) uterine, 3)G-spot.  Clitoral orgasm comes from clitoral stimulation, the uterine orgasm is the result of vaginal penetration, and G-spot orgasm occurs when the g-spot is stimulated through vaginal penetration.

For women this is the stage after she climaxes. Men have an absolute resolution period where they must chill out for a moment.  During this phase, he is physiologically unable to have another erection.  Women do not have to take a break.  They can continue with the sex cycle and cycle back through all of the stages without needing a refractory period.

Activation of the sexual response cycle depends upon a number of different signals in order to be activated.