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ANYONE FOR A FRIENDLY GAME OF CARDS? You may not know how to play strip poker, but everyone knows how to play UNO or a friendly game of twenty-one.  Make your own rules. If you lose a hand of cards, then you have to suck a body-part.  The rest will very quickly become history.

SEX MESSAGING If you haven’t learned how to use the text message function on your mobile phone, you are officially behind the times.  Text messaging can easily turn into sex-messaging.  Imagine that in the middle of your busy day your mobile phone rings, you look down to read, “I can’t wait to taste you again. . .” or “I wanna’ feel myself inside of you. . .”  Your fingers can type what your mouth is sometimes too shy to say.  Sex messaging sets the tone for your next rendez-vous.  You’ve set the stage, now it’s showtime.

HOW ABOUT A MOVIE? You know what time they get home.  About ten minutes before they arrive, put a porno in the DVD player.  They will enter the house to the sounds of cheap synthesizer music, moans, groans, and suction.  They will already know what time it is, the rest is a piece of cake.

JUST PLAY WITH IT. Wear a skirt or some short shorts to the movies.  In the car on the way home, slide your hand up your skirt or down your pants, and start to rub yourself.  Now take your partner’s hand and place it in the midst of all that dampness.  Tell them, “you did that. . .” You two just might have to pull over.