When I am with my partner, He's the giving type... so if he is there ir if he touches me I feel as if in not being stimulated. I had a rabbit vibrator and I used it quite often with him and I could turn and set the speed either high or low. Some of the time I would have it set on low then I would turn it up to get a little more feeling. So he would tell me if you use it on high to long and to often you will numb your clit. So the problem im having is that I feel that way and he's getting frustrated because he thinks he's not pleasing me so he wants to go go go and im just like no no no because im not getting a feeling... I think that I am numb there. What is wrong?
MASTURBATION FOR BEGINNERS
MASTURBATION FOR BEGINNERS
Women seem to have greater barriers to masturbation than men do. The biggest complaint I hear is, “it just doesn’t feel that good,” or “it’s not the same.” I will provide you with tips so that you can become a masturbation expert in no time flat. Because it is certainly a tool that women should be empowered with.
YOU HAVE TO TEACH YOURSELF:
Even though it is fun, masturbation is not something that comes naturally to many women, so you have to teach yourself.
PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT:
It is like training for anything, practice makes perfect.
MAKE YOURSELF FEEL SEXY:
While becoming in tune with the art of masturbation, you should indulge in activities that will make you feel sexy. The sexier you feel, the more likely it is that you will feel like masturbating. Try some of these activities to make you feel sexy:
- Walk Around the House Naked.
- Buy sexy lingerie and cook or clean up the house in it.
- Begin a Workout Routine & Admire the Changes in a Full Length Mirror.
- Skip the Panties; It’ll be Your Own Private Secret.
- Buy satin Sheets & Explore Them With No Clothes On.
KNOW YOUR BODY:
Some women are not sure where the clitoris is located. Re-explore your anatomy and locate the sensitive parts.
IF IT HASN’T BEEN TOUCHED, IT WON’T BE SENSITIVE:
Many women are have not touched their clitorises in so long that the area is no longer sensitive. If you don’t use it, you’ll lose it. Find your clitoris and touch it in a variety of different ways. Place it in between your thumb and your forefinger and stroke it. Place an index finger on the top of it and rub. Pull the hood back and gently touch the tip of it. Find out how you like to be touched so you will know what areas to focus on.
PLAY WITH IT TO MAKE IT FIRM:
As you play with your clitoris it will start to get firm. This is a sign that physiology is taking over. Your mind may not be turned on, but your vagina is getting there.
YOU HAVE TO CREATE YOUR OWN URGE:
One complaint that women voice is that they never feel like doing it. Unlike men, women do not traditionally have overwhelming urges to satisfy themselves sexually. Masturbation can be a useful tool, so I encourage women to do it even when the urge is not there. It will help wake up your sleeping vagina, and it will honestly make you feel a little sexier.
FIND OUT WHAT TURNS YOU ON & USE IT:
Find materials to read, watch, or listen to that you find to be a turn on. Some women find pornographic movies to be offensive, so begin with something simple. All you need is something that will tickle the sexual parts of your mind. Pick up a book of erotic, I recommend Black Erotique, a collection of erotic short stories. Indulge in a round of phone sex with a partner. Surf the Internet for scenes or stories that get you hott. Maybe even watch some sex scenes from your favorite Rated R movies. After your mind has been stimulated sexually, then practice your masturbation technique.
DON’T BE AFRAID TO GET SOME TOYS:
Purchase a toy to help you perfect the art. There are a number of vibrators and ticklers that will help you reach a climax during masturbation. If you cannot see yourself going to the adult bookstore to pick out a toy, buy online. Most sites are very discrete and offer a wide variety of instruments.
CRAWL BEFORE YOU WALK:
Initially when you pick out a toy, remember that you have to crawl before you can walk. Vibrators come in different sizes, shapes, and speeds. At first you should get something that comes with adjustable speeds: hi, med, & lo. Otherwise your first experience will give you too much stimulation and your clitoris might feel as if it has a current of electricity flowing through it. Start slow and work your way into it.
START SMALL & WORK YOUR WAY UP:
Try something small that you can use both on the surface of your clitoris and in your vagina. They sell egg and bullet shaped vibrators that will make for perfect training-vibrators. They are small enough to comfortable insert in your vagina, and at the same time they work great as clitoral stimulators. They usually come attached to a remote control that allows you to adjust the speed from high to low. The bad thing about these vibrators is that there is no handle for you to hold on to. The vibrator slides around when you place it on the outside of your vagina.
THE MINI-MASSAGER IS THE WAY TO GO:
Another good training-vibrator is the mini-massager. This is a tiny cylindrical unit that has three tiny balls at the end that oscillate and vibrate. It is designed to massage the exterior of your vagina but some of these vibrators come with attachments that can be used for penetration. Make sure that you purchase and that allows you to control the speed.
LUBE, LUBE, & MORE LUBE:
When you buy a vibrator, also pick up a bottle of water-based lubricant. The lube will help the vibrator to either slide in your vagina or glide over the surface of your clitoris. This will help to make it feel better. There are a variety of flavors and brands, so pick up sample packs that have a few different flavors to try out.
THE POWER OF TWO:
If you have a partner, masturbation can be great as a group effort. Watching each other masturbate can be a serious turn on.